Sunday, October 31, 2010

beautiful disaster.

Jeremiah says that the heart is deceitful, "who can trust it?" 

Yet I do, everyday.


I am a mess this semester, and I think this will be my way of putting it all out there. 

I'm constantly hitting a brick wall. 

I'm so tired of this wall.

If only I could identify what exactly it is. 

This semester I am supposed to be learning self-discipline, how to live by myself (in a dorm), etc, etc. I just know that's what He is trying to teach me. But I always run. I find people to hang out with, places to go, ultimately escaping this loneliness. 

My heart has been aching towards a certain situation lately. One that I've been healed from, thankfully, yet it has been consuming my thoughts a lot. A wounded heart really does take time. 

Life is a beautiful disaster; i can thank switchfoot for that great phrase. It so perfectly describes my attitude towards life at times. This one in particular.

But I am a warrior princess. He has redeemed me and saved me from my deceitful heart, if I will let Him. Pursue me harder, Lord. Don't let me run anymore.