crunchy peanut butter.

on this day, at this moment- I'm listening to wilco pandora, gazing out the window of the Dripolator coffee house in the tiny town of Black Mountain, North Carolina. It's a breath of fresh air I breathe in slowly and deeply; I'm finally here.

my last days in Mississippi were nothing short of a whirlwind. filled with humbling love, generous friends, supportive family, sweet notes of encouragement, Gilmore Girls and a plethora of emotions.

i'm surprised at how much God is sustaining me. dang that sinful nature that resists trusting His promises. my sweet friends here are taking good care of me, and i'm lucky to have a good amount of alone time to process exactly what is happening. Here am I, in this sweet familiar town, but there is no camp. No other counselors, no campers. It's slightly bizarre. Yet nonetheless, I love it and it strangely feels like home. 

Thusfar, I've done a little work for camp but my full job starts Monday. I've set up my room for the summer, been grocery shopping, spending as much time in the Word as I can and went running today! grocery shopping was amusing. if you know me well, you know i can't cook. bread, peanut butter & honey sandwiches for me! tried crunchy peanut butter for the first time...pretty good! I also tried Curry for the first time last night (YUMMY).

Our Father is sweet to give us good gifts. THIS is a good gift, a sweet season of trying new things like crunchy peanut butter, curry and cauliflower.

Look up, my darling.

Spring has a special way of kissing me on the cheek. It's as if God is leaning down saying, "Here you are, my darling, I know you needed this."
Besides the pollen, no body needs all that.
But, really. The blooming flowers, the enticing sunshine, the constant celebration...It's a season of rejoicing- Winter is over! It seems that this should be the part where I make some sort of analogy for how this is representative of life. For some of you, maybe it is. But for me, right now this doesn't reign true.
God is teaching me to embrace all the sunshine you can get- whether it's just a ray or a full afternoon of it. Metaphorically, of course, I mean that on good days or bad days, when I feel happy or sad, God is still good and you can find sunshine when you look for it.

I'm learning that everyday you have the ability to look up, look outside yourself and be thankful.

from one to another.

from one to another, it seems transition might imbed itself into my life for the next few years. yet it's in transition that i find myself most reliant on my Constant. so, for that I'm thankful. on days like yesterday where i'm thankful for belhaven, a beautiful day, a walk with a friend and boisterous laughter, i actually do question my move. i'm finally comfortable here, Jackson's not so bad. 

for the record, jackson's absolutely not bad. it's definitely not the most hoppin' city around, but fun, friends & true community can be found. this sweet season has been just that...sweet.

while i've taken quite the break from blogging, some of you may not know. in less than two months, i'll embark on my next journey...moving to the mountains of NC! it's unforeseen how long i'll stay or exactly what i'll be doing. but, for a year at least, Black Mountain will be home to me.

the Lord has held my hand through lots of emotions, as I'm sure he will for the remainder of my journey on earth. i've been excited, nervous, anxious, uncertain, sad and many other things over this hooplah called moving. it's really quite the ordeal. but, if not now, when? never again in my life will i have such a wonderful community in two places (black mountain + jackson). following the love God's given me for camp, the people at Merri-Mac and the glorious mountains has resulted in this decision.

but, for now.. I'm completely content. Moving is becoming more a reality, but I'm not there yet. I'm here. in Jackson. working for a church I love wholeheartedly & allowing Jesus to steady my heart daily.

#2 & #3, belated.

I know it's November 4th. The fourth will come later.

For the second and third days of thanks. I can't think of any thing better than these two.

#2.
My sister, Amanda. Words can't even describe the ways that I'm thankful for this woman. Such a loving example of how to be a Godly wife and mother. I will forever be in debt to her for all the phone calls and words of advice I've needed (and continue to need) over the years. Not to mention the rides to dance, meals she fixed for me and hours she spent babysitting me.. :)

#3.
My sister, Jamie. Well, thank God we've grown away from our younger days of disagreement. I'm always grateful for Jamie's nonjudgmental nature- constantly accepting me where I am and encouraging me to be more. I rarely welcome her frank honesty but somehow I'm always appreciative on the other side.

Without these two, I wouldn't be me. But, really. If you knew them you'd know I'm the exact blend of the two. Some days I'll look like Jamie and others like Amanda. Some days I'll act like Jamie and others like Amanda. I can only pray that one day I'll love my children the way these two do. I'm grateful for the opportunity to watch them mother. It's such a blessing. Love you, sisters. :)

thankful #1

the struggles of this season, the thoughts and concerns, the wonders and worries have been incessant since the coming of this new life.

That's why I've been keeping the blog in the dark. In some seasons of life, the darkness of night is just where you are- awaiting for the breaking of dawn, awaiting the light to shine. But, neverthless, it is the Love that Will Not Let Me Go that has been my beaming light. The Lord has given bountifully is many ways- with His overflowing grace and mercy and his continual provision for my vapor of a life on Earth. During this month of November, I'm planning to blog daily on things in my life which deserve thanks.

Today, on November 1, 2012, I am thankful for my parents.  

Every child disagrees with her parents. This child struggles with the desire to please her parents. But every child does not have the support that I've been given from my mama & daddy. Such precious people my parents have become to me. Because they are that- beyond being parents, they are people. I've learned to respect them and love them for who they are and be continually thankful for how they raised me and support me. 

So, here's to you Jimmy & Kathy, and here's to many more years of laughter and learning together.

 

post-grad journey thus far

wow. 
i just read every entry i've made on this blog. it's so interesting how I can so intensely feel the emotions I was having at that specific point in time. 
it's funny how God teaches me things repeatedly. He's so gracious.

well, it's September 2nd. tomorrow will be one month from when I came home from camp and that seems like ages ago. this transition has been difficult as i expected, but different.
gosh, so much in my head. 
things God is showing me: (1) He is the only permanent. This place, my job, my friends, etc won't be with me always. He will. 
(2)relationships are hard, complex and complicated. to really, truly love someone is to be selfless in your love for them. not selfish, wanting to satisfy yourself in some way from your friendship with them. 
(3)adult life is full of responsibility. but is also is full of JOY if you trust Him.
(4)i've been overwhelmed by this list of "ideas for my life" i feel i must accomplish soon. like get married, as if i have any control over that. 

i'm so thankful for this season at Fondren Church. i've been blessed by gracious volunteers and people who want to know and love me. i've seen the behind the scenes of church and haven't been scared off yet. God uses people despite our brokenness, thankfully. 

this journey with Jesus is for the long run. I still need Him every day. every moment of every hour. I need Him to show me my brokenness and lead me to His feet. This post-grad life is unlike anything I've every experienced before (obviously) and it's difficult. but I'm increasingly thankful for God's ever-present hand in my life.

In the Blue Ridge Mountains of Merri-Mac...

Meg, Bex & I at Max Patch for Sunnyside trip.

First sess Sunnyside counselors plus the wonderful Christy Shores.

The one & only Alice Coughlin: my favorite person to laugh with.

My heart: Katherine Albanese, friend, encourager & former camper.

I held this bunny for twenty minutes this past Saturday. #emotionalattachment

 
Two and a half weeks remain for my time at Merri-Mac. 

This summer has been beautiful thus far. The Lord has taught me more about His steadfast love, faithfulness and sovereignty. 

His sovereignty has comforted me when I've felt nervous concerning my job this fall. His steadfast love has reminded me that despite my failures and insecurities, He loves me all the same. He has proved faithful in growing me from my time last summer at camp. God has guarded my heart and blessed me with community, accountability and unexpected friendship during these weeks at Merri-Mac. 

In the weeks to come, I am positive that He will continue to prove faithful in providing what I need for this next season of life. I'm grateful to God that He is my sustainer and refuge. Transitioning home from camp is always tough, and I expect nothing less this time around. Sweet Jesus, teach me to embrace the change of seasons. 

Hello, adult life. See you in a couple weeks!!!

mkaystew